Things my mom says...

I was leaning over my desk reaching for my pen when Chad asked me,
"What happened to your knee again? When was it you had surgery?"
"I'm sorry," I said. "What?" Turning around to face him.
"Knee surgery. When did you have it again?" He repeated.
"Knee surgery?" I was so confused.
"What makes you think I had knee surgery?  I fractured my patella in college, but I've never had knee surgery.  Why are you asking me this like its old news?"
"The scars. I see the scars on the back of your right knee."
"What?!"
"Babe, come here."
I went closer to him.
"These scars." He said as he pointed to scars on the back of my right knee.
Scars that I obviously couldn't see because they were on the back of my knee.
He grabbed my phone and took a picture of them for me.
I stared at them for a few seconds.  Without taking my eyes off the picture I raised my voice and said:
"Mooom, did I have knee surgery when I was young?"
My mom was in the next room and I went over to her and asked again,
"Did I have knee surgery and don't know about it somehow?"
"No.  Never." My mom said.
"Well then, look at the back of my knee, these look like scars."
After looking at them for a minute my mom looked at me and very seriously replied,
"That's just fat.  You know the marks that come when some one is fat? What's it called, I can't think right now"
"Really mom? The back of my knee is fat?"
"Cellulite!" She remembered.
"Cellulite? I have cellulite on the back of my knees??"
"Yes.  I'm sorry, but that's what it is."